I just can't do it anymore, I either drink and hate myself or I'm sober and hate myself but only when I'm sober I result to self harm just to feel anything besides hate and I think I deserve it.
I hate myself too :( it hurts so bad and I cant escape it. Yesterday I drank a ton and made a mess and I cleaned it up today but God I just wish I didnt have to be me. I feel like the worst person in the world.
I get it, I always try to better myself but it only lasts for 2 days and then I go back to my old ways and then I hate myself for not being able to fix myself if that makes sense
Hello again SS this is Jeff & I'm an alcoholic. I know the feeling. Damned if you do, damaged if you don't. Hurting your self is not going help at all. All's you do is making marks on your skin. For what? Chicks don't dig it & it lasts all your life if you take it to far. Life is just not fair. Nether is death. But you can take it from me, one old drunk to another old drunk, it gets better. I have 37 yrs sober & I still think about taking that drink. I live in southern Arizona & when the day gets past 100 degrees I wonder what an ice cold beer would taste like. We have a lot of days over 100 degrees during the summer. So take it one day at a time, if you have to take it one hour at a time. What ever you have to do to get past that desire. My name is Jeff & I'm an alcoholic.