Is it wrong to push down loss? Almost like it never happened? That’s how I did when losing my mom but at the same time I felt kind of free of the emotional abuse. I remember only crying for 5 minutes when it happened 4 years ago and thats it and my aunt screaming at me for not crying. She always made me feel like i was in the way of her and my mother relationship. Always telling me she was her mother first. But then realize last year she had a werid obsession with my mom.
If you had emotional abuse then you wouldn’t have those same emotions for that person. And also every one deals with things differently.
So true. It was just a freedom cry but at the same i did everything I could to make her be affectionate with me.even tried to hug her just to be pushed away literally. It was always like a switch with her. One minute we could laugh and crack joke the next she was telling me I wasn’t going to go far or i’m not doing anything good etc. I remember the night she passed telling a friend I really didn’t like my mom after a argument of her making me feel worthless
Honestly crying is a very personal thing for anyone... I didn’t even cry at my grandpa’s funeral and he was a good man....... Some people feel more comfortable crying in alone time or some just go numb. So I do feel it’s really judgemental and rude/abusive of your Aunt to scorn you for not crying more. You have your own emotions about the situation obviously and I can understand your Aunt is probably in pain and coping with the loss of your mom too, but that doesn’t give her any right to make you feel unworthy or not good enough simply because you’re not displaying the same tears she is........ If I were u, I would stay away from her...it sounds she doesn’t have your best interest ... unfortunately it’s necessary to set boundaries with family members who hurt us....
You are right. And i do stay away from her especially when shes drunk she reminds me everytime that my feelings are not valid. She triggers my anxiety so bad that i can be calm very a good amount of time then when she keeps pushing I become angry once it got so bad that I ended up punching her. And i’m a very lovable person not a fighter. She has this strong urge for me to come crawling to her like a leece and gets angry when I don’t
Thank you so much for listening i find it crazy that strangers help eachother more than family and friends. Shes not worth any type energy no matter if she’s family or not. The means things use to bother me but now you just gotta charge it to the thing called life. I hope you are doing well yourself ❤️