Most important, people find evenings, nights and weekends are often their most lonely and difficult times. Are you able to arrange a regular check in with them during the times they find the hardest? Ask them and see if you can do that? Don’t wait for them to call you?
If the widow or widower is a Senior Citizen, perhaps your parent or other relative, some other supports might be necessary. Keep noticing. Hospice, Compassionate Friends, a counselor or Grief and Loss Coach like me might be a good thing to at least talk about. Just for your knowledge, you can schedule a paid private session or series of sessions with me here on Wisdo, but right now there is a glitch in the tech stuff so if you want to, contact me with a dm or Mommabear to discuss and arrange it.
If the parent or relative does not seem to be functioning, you might want to coordinate a visit to their primary doctor or a geriatric doctor to assess and maybe set up a visit from a visiting nurse or if you are able, to monitor that they are taking meds properly.
There is so much more we could cover here I think that’s it for now, though.
Niall, if you are still here with me, is there anything else you'd like to know or that I can help you with now? Poor Niall. I am putting you on the spot but nobody else seems to be here.
Check back with me any time, and feel free to ask me anything that might be helpful to you. I guess I will sign off for now but will wait a minute or two in case Niall has something to add. Please check out my web sites when you get a chance. The first is aimed at helping and reaching widowed women and the other is for a larger audience too. Please do pass them on if you think someone might be interested, whether or not on Wisdo.
See you soon. Coach Iris Arenson-Fuller, PCC, Life and Loss Transformation/Life Reinvention Coach I don’t only help widows and widowers or people with loss and grief. People come to me for help with finding a new purpose and setting new goals for a happier, more successful life. www.widowscoach.com www.visionpoweredcoaching.com
Hoping you all have a good weekend. Take care. Signing off.
“The most beautiful people I've known are those who have known trials, have known struggles, have known loss, and have found their way out of the depths.” ― Elisabeth Kübler-Ross You are more beautiful than you know because beauty grows with compassion and empathy, two positive possible by-products of terrible loss. —Coach Iris
Don’t forget to join me/us on Friday, the 12th of Feb.
Hi @susan-winter welcome to the widows/ers rebuild lives group. How are you doing? Please can everyone welcome them and introducing yourself here!
Are you holding on to anger after the death of your spouse, partner or another loved one? Anger at the departed? Anger at the world? Anger at others who have not understood your pain? Let’s talk about this on Friday at 4 EST in my group. Widows/Widowers Rebuilding Life ( still waiting for name change please, Wisdo Techs). Let’s acknowledge true feelings, share, understand and learn how to handle and get rid of that anger. “For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness”. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Session for Friday, Feb 26 at 4 PM EST Hello Wisdo Folks. I invite you to join me today at 4 EST. While it is technically a session for widows and widowers or those who’ve lost their partner, anyone is welcome to come and talk about and learn about loss and grief of other loved ones who have passed on. ****** Today’s theme is Speak Their Name. It can help to share things about your loved one. Come tell us one or more of your treasured memories and listen to others. Sharing and honoring them by speaking of them can be an important step in the grief process. Sometimes family and friends do not understand and are uncomfortable about this sharing, which can hurt the bereaved who need the sharing. So come and speak their names and tell us , if you feel ready. You will find a safe space to do this in our session , but I try to keep the environment a positive one too, and not a place filled with misery or self-pity. The focus is sharing but also learning and a desire to feel better in spite of your grief. Let’s try to come up with a goal or two you can commit to for the coming week. Simple, small goals are a good place to start. What might yours be? Will you be there at 4? I don’t love talking to myself.😍
Memorial Session/Sharing Goal Setting for Week Feb 26, 2021 Session Welcome to our session. Please introduce yourself when you join us here, if at all possible. I know that is hard for some people and they are more comfortable just being quiet but it helps us all to have active participants.
I am so sorry, but something important has come up and I won’t be doing the chat group this afternoon at 4 EST( March 5th). I apologize. Come and say hello any time. Coaches on Wisdo are also available for booking private coaching sessions! If you are a widow, widower or have lost another loved one through death, come to this group or pm me. I may do a Zoom in the near future also. Wisdo likes to have a helper or guide present on Zooms. Would you like to volunteer to help out some time if 4-5 ET would not be too late for you? Let me know so I can run it by Dr Gill.
Hi to . @angie brown, I didn’t realize people joined this as a community. It’s a group session i do on Fridays. I may do it via Zoom sometime soon but it has been a texting chat so far. Glad to have you here and sorry i could not hold the session today.
Who is lonely today? Do something about it! Reach out to someone else. Get out of your own head and troubles for a bit! Listen to someone else. Watch what that does for your lonely feelings. #ReachOut #Loneliness #Connect #EspeciallyinPandemic How many friends or family members have you "been meaning" to call, or to see, but you simply haven't gotten around to it? We all lead such busy, crazy lives nowadays, or most of us do. The sudden loss of someone in our lives always makes us think along these lines. For a brief while we become committed to change, but then we revert to our old patterns. I know all too well, personally, how life can change in the blink of an eye. Make a list of the people you care for and have missed having in your life. Commit to calling and reconnecting with at least one of those folks this week. Keep up the momentum. Don't just call them though. Call them and listen to what is going on in their lives...really listen and show your support,, love and interest.
See Zoom info below. Notice: Come visit with my community on Fridays at 4. This time it’s on Zoom. More often it’s a texting chat. WISDO Friday 4 PM EST,. March 12. Rebuilding Life-Loss of Spouse or Partner Session with Coach Iris Arenson-Fuller, PCC, CPC Anyone who has lost other loved ones is also welcome to attend. ********************* Plain Talk and Sharing For this Zoom- What is your biggest challenge right now? Can you share something that has helped you with your grief or something you find or found inspirational that could help others. Let's get to know each other. Come prepared to share a fun or silly fact about yourself too. People need to smile and laugh, even in the throes of grief. That is part of awakening to life and staying healthy. It’s Ask Me Anything Friday. I try to keep the conversation real, sincere and kind, and not dominated by negativity, but if you have something you need to express, it's fine. If you need extra help, you may pm me on Wisdo or we will get a Guide to help you. Looking forward to getting to know you. ——————————————- Iris Arenson-Fuller is inviting you to a scheduled Zoom meeting for Wisdo. Time: Mar 12, 2021 04:00 PM Eastern Time (US and Canada) Join Zoom Meeting https://us02web.zoom.us/j/89264463574?pwd=azN6MmJTWTl3QWpWblprT0w0Tndudz09 Meeting ID: 892 6446 3574 Passcode: 050133
Join me on Zoom today at 4 EST. See above message for Zoom and session details.
Don't forget to tune in to the group on Zoom today, March 12th. Join Zoom Meeting https://us02web.zoom.us/j/89264463574?pwd=azN6MmJTWTl3QWpWblprT0w0Tndudz09
If you are here, scroll up and find us on Zoom today. Looking forward to meeting you soon. 2 minutes.
March 12 will always be the worst day of my life, for as long as I live, though I have surely had a few close seconds. Yet, I have survived and plenty more than just that. If you had told me that I would way back when, I would not have believed it. Some years the feelings and memories get to me more than others. I deploy my “Emergency Protocol” that I have ready in advance. I often work with my coaching clients who have lived through loss and trauma, to help them develop their own personal emergency protocol when they find themselves sidelined on those tough anniversaries and other significant days. Today those memories are strong, but so is my gratitude for so much!
Missed you at the Zoom session today!
Welcome Friends: Before we begin, today, Friday March 19th, I want to introduce myself, if you don't know me. I am Iris. I have been a trained and credentialed Life and Loss Transformation/Life Reinvention Coach now for 12 yrs and worked in the social services field with individuals, couples and families for 30 years before that. I was a young widow, now long remarried, but have also had many other significant losses. I have a private coaching practice, Vision Powered Coaching My web sites are www.visionpoweredcoaching.com and www.widowscoach.com
Hello Everyone: My Friday Group Session at 4 PM Eastern Daylight Savings Time (N.Y. Time) is for those who are widows, widowers or have lost a partner, but others who are interested or have lost a loved one, are always welcomed. Please come to the session on Friday, March 26th if you are free. It will be a texting chat session this week again. I generally have a planned topic or two, but you may also bring issues or questions to the table and we can discuss what is on your hearts and minds. This week my plan is to discuss: HOW CAN COACHING HELP ME THROUGH AND BEYOND MY GRIEF? WHAT IS IT? and also: Discussion--THE BEST VERSION OF MYSELF IS YET TO COME.. Do you believe that statement? Is it possible for you even after you have lost your dear spouse, partner or close loved one? I believe it is probably not, IF you have convinced yourself it isn't possible. Let's talk about that! What else? Well, that depends on what you bring to the table. You make these sessions dynamic. We coaches love to have you attend our sessions, rather than talking to ourselves for an hour or more. Come prepared to chat, to meet each other, or at least to say hi and let us know you're there, if you're shy. You are a valuable part of my community. I see that there are a large number of people who are part of this community, but I would love to meet you in my live sessions. If you are not free at that time, please pop in any time, read what's there and leave some comments. Here's a link directly to my Friday 4 PM group. https://wisdo.com/communities/widowsers-rebuild-lives See you soon! Regards, Coach Iris
Complaining is draining, my friends. Let’s train ourselves to talk 20% of the time about the problem and 80% of the time about the solution.
Loneliness/Dating and Other Issues After Death of Spouse or Partner-Friday, April 2nd, 4 PM New York Time (DST) A chat group tomorrow-not Zoom This is a group for widows and widowers but others are also welcome if they come with an open mind and not with a lot of pre-judgments. If you have lost someone else close to you, we can support you and be understanding, though most often the issues are not exactly the same as when you have lost your spouse or life partner. You are still welcome to pop in.
Join me in welcoming Mary to show your support. Reply and say hi 😊
Loyal Regulars and Others.. My sincere apologies. I was unable to conduct this group today. I am sorry if you visited and saw there was no session. Please come back next Friday at 4 Eastern Time. There is a new title for the group and a slightly new description. Please feel free to contact me by direct message if I can help you. Remember that if you were invited to Wisdo by your insurance company, you are entitled to 3 completely free private coaching sessions. You can book a session by scrolling to the top of these groups run by me and other coaches . There you will see a purple banner that says Book a Session. —————————————— New name is Grief and Life Redesign New description: Grief & Life Redesign Iris Arenson-Fuller Welcome! In this group, we discuss the many challenges and changes people can experience on their grief journeys when they have lost a spouse or another loved one. Grief can be complicated and the journey is unique to each person, though there are often some common things that people go through. Grief is usually forever, contrary to common belief. It shifts and changes in nature and intensity. Misery and suffering don't really have to be forever. The passage of time may help, but it will not heal us by magic. We are not the same as we were before we lost a spouse, or another beloved person. However, there are things we can do to help us rebuild and redesign our lives so we can find new joy and purpose, in spite of our sadness and pain. Let's talk about your challenges, examine ideas that can help you, and discuss ways you can begin to find your new normal and move forward, in your own style and time frame. I have personally survived many very tough losses and changes. That's why I get so much satisfaction from helping my clients figure out their new normal and create new plans and goals.
Reflection #Grief #Spring #Awakening #Becoming Since we are in the new season of spring, it is an especially good time for reflection. If you have lost a loved one, your world has changed.There may have been times when you wished you could have been buried with, or left this world with your dear one. Instead, you often buried yourself in your sadness, misery and sometimes in feelings of isolation. Spring is a season of rebirth, recommitment, reawakening, fresh new beginnings. If you are still hiding under a cloak of misery, take time to notice all the things around you that speak to, and show us how all must come to life again in this new season. If you have finally begun to blossom, to reach up to the sun, and start to grow into whoever it is you are, or want to become, then rejoice in that. There is much sadness in life, but also much over which we can and must rejoice. ~ Coach Iris, Life and Loss Transformation/Life Reinvention Coach
UNACKNOWLEDGED OR DISENFRANCHISED GRIEF April 23 -4 PM EDT Welcome to everyone. If you could introduce yourself or at least give a shout out and say your name and hi, that would be great. It just feels like a safer space when we know who is here with us. When you join us, try to say hi. If you want to, tell us what brings you here today too.
Write and share with me what you most need help or most struggle with about grief and loss. I would like to make my weekly session, GRIEF & LIFE REDESIGN, Friday 4pm NY time as relevant and helpful to you as I can. PM with a summary of your challenges. Just know, though, that I try to keep things honest and feeling, but to bring hope and some positivity even into difficult topics. Or tell me here if you don’t want to pm. Come join me on Fridays.
Staying bitter, angry or miserable is a choice. We have to make the effort it takes to manage our attitudes and our behavior. Who here has some blessings they want to share and acknowledge today? How are you blessed right now, in this very moment?